Creating Sizzling Chemistry

October 11th, 2006   •   2 comments   

We all know the age old saying “no man is an island” which alludes to the fact that we need each other. Be it in social and family settings, at work, with friends, at a club, or other settings. If you isolate yourself from the rest of the world, you will find increasingly that you will lose touch and lose your relevance in the various social spheres where you operate in. This is why it is especially sad to see people who live alone in their homes and carry on their daily lives without anybody to share them with.

However, the other thing to bear in mind in relationships is chemistry. This is an intangible factor which is hard to define, but you know it when you see it or feel it. There are some folks whom you can immediately hit it off with, chatting like long lost friends from the word “go” and feel totally comfortable with each other. Naturally, those whom you can generate the best chemistry with would end up as either your life partner or “blood” relatives.

On the other hand, there may be people whom you find difficult to approach even with a 10 metre pole. For some reason or other, their interests, body language, tone of voice and values seem alien to you. The way they speak, the manner in which they behave, and their approach to life seem foreign, weird, and maybe even repugnant.

The gurus tell us that if you want to succeed – in life, love and career – you need to bridge that affinity gap and generate chemistry with people from all walks of life. The fancy name for this is emotional intelligence or EQ. As a Christian, I believe this was what Jesus Christ had done when he came to Earth more than 2,000 years ago. He mingled with and befriended sinners, prostitutes, tax collectors and other then riff raff of society. He showed by example what it meant to be a great leader of people, and had many followers. This philosophy has in fact been marketed in modern day age (Jesus as CEO).

This has been a lifelong challenge for me. How does one generate “electricity” and magnetism with the people that I meet at work or at play? How does one relate to others sincerely and honestly without fear of any negative retribution? Is it really possible to befriend everybody that you meet? More importantly, do you have to “sleep with the enemy” to achieve your goals in life?



  1. Anonymous
    posted on Oct 11, 2006 at 12:40 PM

    I believe one have to keep his focus on the Lord Almighty..since all were created in His image, it also meant that we are all in some way similar to God. So if we dislike, loathe, disdain someone else, we are guilty of hatred towards God. Of course all these are pure B.S talk about what it should be. We are, after all sinners….I think the essence of it all is the attitude…trying !
    There are some people in my office that I know I have to try & try & try to not hate them. Honestly, I failed miserably & often too.

    Chemistry is indeed everything especially for the initial meeting with a “love, hate” candidate. Some people just don’t have the EQ – by the way, if IQ is rated as 150 (genius), 100 is above average etc. How is EQ rated, someone elighten me please….I mean seriously.

    Anyway I just got home from work & wanted to vent. Had a “nothing new but nevertheless shitty day at the office” wanted to tell someone. I know you are reading it Bro !!!

  2. posted on Oct 11, 2006 at 1:08 PM

    Thanks for reading and your comments bro. I think the route to engendering better relationships with anybody – be it at work or in social setting – is to surrender ourselves to God’s will. Somehow, I find that it does work for me. Life’s challenges will still be there, but at least there is somebody holding our hand and showing us the way.

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